Thursday, May 26, 2011

Snore-drobez & SLUGGZ

     Thus far we have focused on some of the main breeds of the scorpion women. We now know how to identify and sight scorpions in different settings but the scorpion women can take on many forms. Current researchers have not identified the many types but I have taken the time to document two breeds.

We first look at the scorpion in the snore-drobez

     Snoredrobez our a simple breed it usually consist of whatever a scorpion women roles out of bed in after a hard night of sucking the life out of one of our brethren. She will be too tired to dress for what ever activity she needs to be up for. We have all seen it the girl in our 8am class, she shows up in a north face, baggy pajama bottoms(or sweatpants), most likely rolled up at the top a few too many times, really zoning in on the crotch area of the scorpion. You might think maybe you don’t have a scorpion on your hands but this is just as dangerous, not having the proper amount of zhenka in its system it will most likely to lash out. What ever you do, do not engage in any type of communication with this grouchy scorpion. Scorpions can be viewed in the snordrobe from 6a.m to 1p.m it is said this stage is important for them to re-energize and complain with other scorpion how what ever they did last night did not meet scorpion standards. Places they are commonly seen, dinning hall areas, early classes, and returning movies to redbox (presumably a week or so late)

      SlUGGZ- the word sluggz is derived from a simply combination of sluts and uggz, this may be a harsh term but hear me out. SLUGGZ is the breed of scorpion that have convinced themselves that body heat is stored at the feet and wearing uggz will keep them warm no matter what else they wear. We usually see SLUGGZ in the late fall to early winter months. They usually walk around in a northface, booty shorts and you guessed it, uggz. As many of us have probably thought to our selves “why the fuck is this girl wearing booty shorts? its like 40 degrees out right now” The scorpion women will say that the uggz keep them warm, this has still not been scientifically proven but I will just take their word for it. We also see sluggz on summer nights at the beach walking in chilly weathers with uggz to keep them warm. This breed is also extremely dangerous because they are too dumb to know they are cold so they become bitchier then ever. Drama is the only thing that will soothe the savage beast. My advice, stay away, do not be lured in by boot shorts, because you are dealing with one angry scorp with an ego as big as its ass.

Hope this has been helpful.
"Knowledge is our only weapon"

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