Scorpion Woman: Scorpions in the Snowboarding World

Saturday, May 28, 2011

Scorpions in the Snowboarding World

The Scorpion Woman is traveling the globe, expanding their target market. They have seeped into the cracks of our beloved snowboard scene. WE MUST GET THE OUT. UNLESS THEY'RE DUMPING THEM OUT CONSTANTLY.

"these gurls" The classic snowboard groupie. Lurking around the snow with the expensive camera that their dad just bought them in hopes they would do something productive with it. Instead they take aggressive facebook photo's with a big smile on their facing thinking are the hottest of the hot. But they are the nottest of the not.

son - "mom, can I have money for some pizza?"

mom - "NO."

Simple as that, scorpion woman don't feed their offspring.

These photo's have been submitted by our very own "eyes"

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SPECIAL FEATURE: The Great White North-Face

There is no greater threat to our existence then the white north face girl, she is by far the most hardcore of the scorpion women. Although rare they do exist, sources believe they are responsible for the creation of most scorpion women. If you ever encounter the great white north face you should just run, drop your beer, grab your backpack and leave the area. This scorpion has shown up to the party to ruin everyones night. What ever party she is at is never going to meet her standards. She has been texting 20 different dudes since she got there. This breed is the most protective for every substance is a threat to the pristine condition of their pure white north face. Don't be thrown off by how much she stands out from her black north face counter parts she is going to cause more drama then you ever believed. It is unwise to mate with the white north face, but if you get the chance get after it and destroy the jacket. You may not make it out alive but you may have saved millions of parties. Keep your eyes open the scorps are out there and they are armed with zhenka and pepsi max.
"knowledge is our best weapon"
- C-Note